ILLY: Who Dem Guys With Dat Pigskin Ball?

** Editor's Note: All names in this story are fictional including team names. =========== Who Dem Guys With Dat Pigskin Ball? It was a January Sunday afternoon and everyone in Louisiana was excited about their professional football team, the Louisiana S'aints who were playing the Texas Doomboys in the National Football Conference championship game. It was after halftime and well into the fourth quarter with about 8 minutes left on the game clock. The score was tied 20 - 20 and Texas had just kicked off after scoring a touchdown. "Down, Set, Hut!" The action way down below on the football field took place at the sound of the "Hut" as both teams moved at the line of scrimmage. On the offensive side of the ball in gold and black uniforms were the Louisiana S'aints featuring the high powered offense of Donny Brezo, Ronnie Rush and company. On the other side in white and navy uniforms were the Texas Doomboys known for their crushing defense. And high above the field well out of the way sat Mr. ILLY, the well known deaf-blind clown watching the game through his high powered binoculars. "Wow," exclaimed someone sitting by Mr. ILLY. "That was a tough play that Rush just made in twisting away from a gang of Doomboys to run for fifteen yards before being tackled by Benny Worth." "Yeah, I saw that!" Mr. ILLY exclaimed. "Great moves with flying feet." Glancing at the scoreboard Mr. ILLY saw the S'aints were at their own 38 yard line with the clock ticking away at 7 minutes and down. Mr. ILLY was wondering to himself if the S'aints could bury the ghosts of the past and stun the Doomboys. He hoped so because he did not want to see the Doomboys in the Super Duper Bowl. A roar rose from the crowd knocking Mr. ILLY's thinking cap off! He put his binoculars to his eyes and saw players whooping it up in the endzone, the S'aints had scored! "Darn it!" exclaimed Mr. ILLY to the person next to him, "I missed that play, what happened?" "Brezo just threw a long pass to Tom Shocks who caught the ball on the run and galloped into the endzone for the go-ahead touchdown and now just 5:28 left on the clock!" "Go S'aints Go!" Mr. ILLY crossed his fingers and inside his shoes he also crossed his toes! "Let's go S'aints!" he too shouted. The Doomboys still had time to score again but hopefully the S'aints defense would rise up and stop them dead in their tracks. Not so fast! The Doomboys quarterback, Tonta Ronee guided the Doomboys to the S'aints 5-yard line in just 8 plays. It was first and goal with 1:15 left on the clock. The crowd was a bit too quiet as they waited to see what would happen. The first play was a running play and the Doomboys runner picked up a yard to put the ball on the S'aints four yard line. "This place is too quiet." Mr. ILLY said to himself. Then it hit him! Without hesitating he jumped to his feet and started chanting "We want PAYBACK!" "We want PAYBACK!" He was indeed referring to the game in the regular season when, right here in the same staduim, the same Doomboys had ended the S'aints undefeated season. People around Mr. ILLY heard his chant, saw him standing there and knew what he was getting to! They stood too and yelled "Yes, PAYBACK!", "We want PAYBACK!", "PAYBACK, PAYBACK, ALL the WAY!" The S'aints players on the field heard the yelling and they knew what they had to do! On second down, another running play, they stopped the Doomboys runner right there. No gain! Third down was a passing play that S'aints defender Bob Thomas was just barely able to flip away with a finger for an incomplete pass. This brought up fourth down and the crowd was wild and crazy with the chanting for PAYBACK. Texas had called their final timeout. They needed to think of what to do. S'aints players were flapping their arms to get more from the crowd. "PAYBACK, PAYBACK!" went the chant. Texas was ready to try to tie the game up again. Fourth and goal, down to their last chance! The clock read just :10 left. Doomboys' Ronee faded back to pass, looked downfield and was smacked by S'aints defensive end, Mike Masters! Game over and the crowd was even wilder! The S'aints were on the way to the Super Duper Bowl! Mr. ILLY sank to his seat with emotions running crazy! He unknowingly had got the crowd going with his "PAYBACK' chant. TV cameramen and reporters were climbing the steps to get to him! Asked how he felt about getting the noise going, Mr. ILLY looked into the camera and said to the reporter, "All I was doing was trying to wake up the nervous sleeping giant! After all, I am only a clown! Clowns make people happy. The players deserve the attention down there, they are the ones who won the game so get down there and talk to them, not me! Time for me to go back home to Georgia and root next year for my team to do some payback!" With that statement, Mr. ILLY rose to leave, preparing to walk away from the stadium that had just gone crazy because of him! Written by: Mr. ILLY, the Deaf-Blind Clown December 30, 2009

 

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